Anyone else noticing the slight de-masculinization of some of the hubbies out there? Goes hand-in-hand with the ’manning-up’ taking place on our part. What am I talking about, you ask?
Well, are you letting your husband be THE MAN? I’m talking about a man in all of his great man-hood glory. A hairy and scary, on the loud side, terrible-at-loading-the-dishwasher kind of man. Trust me, you want him to be that way if you want him to be the ‘out-in-front’ shield for the family, like he’s programmed deep down inside to be.
And what does driving have to do with this, anyway? Well, is it just me, or has anyone else noticed how many more women out there are the ones driving the whole family around, instead of the husband? And why in the world does this even warrant a blog entry? Because it’s driving me crazy every time I see it!!
I’ll be honest… my husband was the first to point this out. He even started nicknaming these gals “Danica”, named after Danica Patrick, the lone female Nascar driver. Here’s my husband’s point… If you gals want your man to lead, then get out of the driver’s seat! Nothing screams “I’m refusing to give up control!” more than the lady pulling into the church parking lot with her husband next to her in the passenger seat… probably holding her purse.
It doesn’t matter if it’s ‘your’ car (i.e. the minivan). It will take you about 15 seconds to put the seat back into your own position the next time you drive it. And even though it’s not a HEMI 4X4, your husband will still feel more of a man behind the wheel of that minivan, with his pretty wife next to him, than he would sitting in the passenger seat, doing nothing more than handing the kids their graham crackers and searching the backseat for the baby’s chucked pacifier.
And I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one feeling this way. We happened to discuss this topic the other day with one of my brothers and his wife. Interestingly enough, this exact issue became a pivotal point in their marriage. When they were newlyweds, they took a trip back to her childhood hometown (he’d never been there before.) The first morning of the visit, she hops into the driver’s seat of the rental car with plans to drive him around and show him all the points of interest.
Brother: ”Uh…What are you doing?”
Sis-in-law: “Showing you around! Hop in!”
Brother: “Uh… I don’t think so. Not gonna happen.”
Sis-in-law: ” What? C’mon! Let’s go!”
Apparently, it turned into quite a ‘discussion’. I think my brother said he agreed to let her show him around for like, half-of-a-half of a morning, and then it transitioned into an “I’ll drive and you point” kind of tour. However, my dear sis-in-law said it ended up completely setting the tone for their marriage. She knew from that point on he would be faithful in the call to lead, like he was designed to do.
Look, if we want to feel safe and secure under our husband’s protection, then let him do his job. Believe me, a man secured in his role makes a far better husband than one that’s always scrambling to please a commanding woman.